Mopeds, cows and a monkey

Feeling relieved.

I’m here!

I’m currently sat outside in shorts, a vest and flip flops at 8.20pm in the hotel restaurant in front of the sea.

It’s warm, probably about 25 degrees even though it’s pitch black. But there is a nice sea breeze which makes it very comfortable. 

So, how did I get here? Was it the smooth and easy journey I was hoping for…not really!

The flight from London was delayed, in the end we took off about an hour late. Whilst waiting to board I got chatting to a lovely Indian lady, who was interested in my adventure and couldn’t believe I was doing it alone. Her suggestion was that I should hire a car and drive around. Her reason being that I could lock the doors and I’d be safe. I’m not sure I would be safe on the roads though! We waited until the queue died down and walked on together. She had gone mad on duty free so I helped carry her bags on, and she thanked me with a can of ginger ale and a pot of water. I didn’t see her again on the flight, but it was nice to chat to her.

The flight was ok, it felt long but I didn’t get to that point where I felt I had had too much. There was a man in front of me who became ill so they had to get a doctor. He was ok, just a bit hot. We were served dinner, chicken and pasta and then the lights went off.

I watched Bridget jones’ baby, some friends and some Big Bang theory. I drifted in and out of a light sleep, planes are just so uncomfortable. I had a window seat, but I’m always worried I’m going to end up leaning on the person next to me, or dribbling!! I was sat next to 2 adult brothers, going home for the easter holidays. They were very quiet and easy passengers. 

About an hour before we landed we were given fruit salad and a muffin which was sweet and sticky. 

Due to the delay in London, we landed at 11.30am and my next flight was at 12.45 so it didn’t leave much time. This was where it started to get stressful. 

Once off the plane, I walked miles through the airport and then through passport control where I needed to fill in a little form to go with the visa. It took ages to scan my face, eyes and fingers. Then I had to wait for my bag to come onto the carasol, take it through customs to declare nothing. And then it started all over again! Check in, then security and a really long walk to the gate which I made just in time. Phew!

The flight from Mumbai to Goa was so short! We got up to altitude, then randomly had hot omelette rolls served and quickly taken away and then we were on the decent! I don’t think it needed a food service for the hour flight, it just seemed to cause the air crew lots of stress. However, I was very pleased to have a bottle of water from them after my journey through the airport! It was hot!

We didn’t go very high up, so could take a few photos of India below me. 

Goa airport was easy. Just collected my bag and out the door. There was a short Indian man holding my full name (I had prebooked a taxi transfer). There was then some confusion as another man came over and said he was there for me too, but he just had my first name. Luckily the company text through the car registration so I knew the first man was right. 

He took my bag and we got into the car. And then the real madness began. There was a driver plus the man that met me, and we zoomed off beeping the horn at every person or animal we saw. 

I couldn’t understand the use of the horn. There were so many. Beep if someone was in your way. Beep if you were over taking or under taking someone. Beep if someone slows down. Beep if someone over takes you. 

We had mopeds to weave round, lorries to overtake, cows to avoid, all at the same speed with just the horn being used, not the brake! There were a few scary moments where we were going head on into incoming traffic. There were also speed bumps that he just hurtled over. 

And then, as we were going round some country roads, a monkey crossed the road in front of us. The driver still didn’t slow down. Crazy!

We eventually arrived after a 2 hour drive. The first half of the journey I was ok, I couldn’t take everything in and there was just so much to look at. Little shacks where people live, concrete buildings painted bright colours or covered in Vodaphone logos. Small boys, barefoot, playing in the dusty yards. Women and girls selling fruit and vegetables at the side of the road. Cows and dogs just strolling around. Buses full to the brim, colourful and slow. New tarmac being laid but with no signs or warnings that the road was shut on one side. Everywhere I looked thee was something new. 

And then the tiredness got me, and I was struggling to keep my eyes open. But I couldn’t fall asleep in the back of a taxi on my first day in India! Very unsafe! So I had to keep shaking my head, breathing deeply and trying to fight off the tiredness. It was then that the monkey flew across the road so I was then more alert to see if I could spot anymore. 

The drivers didn’t know where the hotel was, but after a few false arrivals we got here. There are about 12 wooden huts, a bit like sheds, some upstairs (which mine is). Then the restaurant is on the grass area just above the beach with a little bar too. Just casual tables dotted around, some under a canopy, some out on the beach side

There must be steps downs onto the beach and then the sea is right there! 

This is the view from my front door – pretty nice!

When I arrived I thought about going for a swim, but I was exhausted and thought that might be slightly dangerous as I’m not the strongest swimmer. 

I had a shower instead which was an experience! The hut is all wood inside, including the bathroom. I turned on the main shower and water squirted everywhere. As in horizontally to the other side of the bathroom and hit the wall. There is a bucket in the corner of the shower, so I used this to catch most of the spray, but then I noticed there was a hole in that corner of the  floor too for drainage. I think I might use the hand held shower head from now on! 

After my shower I tired to have a nap but couldn’t sleep. I did a bit of social media and texting but felt better for the rest on the bed  

The bedroom is simple, but has a lovely big bed, air conditioning and an ensure. Everything that I need.

It gets dark here about 6.30pm so when I got up to explore a bit, it was dark! So I have made it to the restaurant and will go exploring tomorrow. 

So far,  I have had 3 major wobbles since getting on the plane.

The first was ridiculous and I know it was…all the water pots given on the plane had a best before date of his birthday. It was just a date I didn’t need to see. This year he turns 30 in December, and we had talked about where we would be to celebrate. Now we probably won’t be on the same continent.

The second was when I got out of the taxi, in a dusty track with shacks surrounding me. Where am I? What am I doing? I know that is because I was tired, hot and sticky but it was a horrible feeling. To be in the middle of nowhere, having no idea where I was meant to be going and having no support. 

And then the third was because he has been having a huge water fight for Thai new year today. Another thing we had planned together. We are texting like normal, as if we are just on a separate holiday from each other. There are just no I love you’s added in. I miss him so much. I want him here to share this experience with me. Or I want to be there, doing our plan. When am I going to stop feeling like this? How do I stop feeling like this? Do I need to remind him that I miss him? If I don’t tell him will he think I don’t?

Argh, now I’ve got a tear. No! I’m not going to cry, not out here in front of the sea on my first night. 

I know these first few weeks are going to be hard. But they are something I need to get through, which will make me stronger. And either that strength will help to get what I want, or it will help me get through what I don’t. 

I want to believe in love. I probably shouldn’t, but I want to believe that love will conquer and shine through. He just needs to believe in it too, and to forgive himself.

And building the strength and belief in love is all part of finding Sazzle. 


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